Let’s Talk Gun’s… and Our Children.

Siiiighhhh. Guns. A topic I really struggle with. I am typically a person that can see the opposing side of arguments, but for whatever reason guns have always totally freaked me out. So you can imagine how I feel about guns, and children being around or involved with them. It terrifies me! I’m also the type of person who loves when someone challenges my thought process or beliefs, which is exactly what Jeremy Daugherty, a Marine Corps Veteran and now Owner + Founder of Everyday Citizens Tactical, LLC (which is a company based on training civilians on gun usage and survival preparedness) does to me. Jeremy and I have different life experiences, which is why I have chosen him to have this conversation with. For context, I did not grow up shooting guns, talking about guns, etc. My parents may have had a firearm in the house, if they did, I had no idea. It just wasn’t a conversation. Maybe this is why I have the predisposition towards guns that I have. I think having a conversation with someone whose beliefs are different is a great way to educate yourself further and open your eyes to the biases you may have. So, here we go!

Katherine: Hi Jeremy, thanks so much for taking the time to answer a few of my very liberal questions. LOL. First, if you tell us your title, how you’ve become educated in gun safety and a little bit about your background-”

Jeremy: “My name is Jeremy, I am a Marine Corps Veteran of 5 years where I primarily served as part of the Embassy Security program. Now, I am a Firefighter/EMT and the owner/founder of Everyday Citizens Tactical LLC. A company based on raising the standards of training and professionalism for civilians and professionals alike. We aim to provide classes and instructions on a wide range of topics, some of which are: Firearms proficiency and application (both rifle and pistol), medical, preparedness, survival and community preparedness and response.”

Katherine: “What is the purpose of having a gun in the home?”

Jeremy: “The purpose of a firearm in the home is the same as having a firearm in any location. Which is the defense and preservation of human life. However, the advantages of having a firearm in the home (or any location) are quite extensive. Firearms, when placed in the hands of responsible and trained individuals, help "even the playing field" for any potential violent situation. Whether this be because the defender is smaller, outnumbered, outrained, etc. One of my favorite expressions goes something like this: "A firearm in the hands of a potential victim is more useful than help on the phone".”

Katherine: “What can families do to keep their children safe when a gun is in the home?”

Jeremy: “The most acknowledged yet under practiced precaution in the gun world is education. You can never educate someone too much. As the saying goes "curiosity killed the cat". Children, regardless of age, can be quite curious about things they know little about. Specifically when they are shut out from certain topics and not explained the "why's". In addition, a level of "security" should be practiced based on your individual situation. Though added levels of security such as safes or gun locks may prevent accidents, they may delay your ability to use or access a firearm during an emergency, which negates the purpose of the firearm. There is a balance with no one perfect answer for everyone.”

Katherine: “How can we prevent unintentional shootings?”

Jeremy: “One thing we must come to terms with is that accidents do happen and nothing is fully preventable. Similar to car accidents, we provide education to everyone on safe driving and the skills along with it, yet humans are not perfect and whether intentional or not, accidents happen. This is something we have come to terms with because the pros of having vehicles outweigh the cons. On average, there are roughly 38,000 fatalities from car accidents in the USA every year. There are an average of 492 fatalities from firearm related accidents (unintentional use) per year. As far as preventable steps go, education is once again the most important step.”

Katherine: “Studies show that kids are naturally curious, even when they've been told they should leave guns alone. How do we curve this curiosity in a safe way?”

Jeremy: “We teach kids to look both ways before crossing the street, we also tell them why (so they don't get hit by a car). We teach kids not to touch hot ovens, we also tell them why (so they don't get burned). We must treat firearm safety and education with the same type of in depth education. However, if adults and parents are not educated on gun safety, how can they teach their children?”

Katherine: “In the past decade, 40% of suicides committed by kids or teens involved guns. 9/10 of these suicides were with guns that the victims accessed at their own homes or from a relatives home. How can we prevent this from happening? What is the best safety practice? Do you recommend certain products?”

Jeremy: “I commonly do not like focusing on the method in which suicide occurs regardless of the demographic. I believe it takes away from the mental health issues we face as a nation and gives our society a way to shift the blame to make ourselves feel better. The unfortunate reality is, if someone truly wishes to cause them self harm, preventing one method will not stop them (and I can attest to this as both an EMS professional and military veteran with friends who have committed suicide both in and out of service). However, if a family feels most comfortable taking extra steps to secure their firearms, but feels the need to have quick access to them, I suggest they pursue fingerprint or numerical coded electronic safes. These types of safes, though pricey and mainly focused around hand guns, can be that balance we spoke about. I also think it is important to note that if a parent is not willing to extensively train their children with firearms on a consistent basis, that child should not have ease of access to begin with. Whether an adult or child, someone who handles a firearm often is less likely to misuse it.”

Katherine: “Should you teach a child how to properly handle a firearm? If so, at what age is that appropriate from a professional standpoint?”

Jeremy: “I very much believe kids should be normalized and informed about firearms from a young age. For those that are very young (that 4-7 age range), something as simple as cleaning your firearm on the kitchen table provides an ample opportunity for education. A naturally curious child will probably ask questions. Which gives you the ability to not only educate them, but desensitize them (people regardless of age make irrational decisions when ill informed or nervous). From 8-13, we start to introduce weapons handling and weapon safety rules to children. This puts them at an age where they can grasp and follow instructions better and is a key development point in learning. From this point on, the level at which a minor has access or the ability to use should be determined by a parent on a case by case basis. There are many great examples of middle aged to teenage children who compete in different firearms competitions who handle firearms better than most adults. This was only made possible from early education and exposure.”

Katherine: “Were you raised around guns? How were you introduced to guns?”

Jeremy: “Yes, but not at the age you may assume. I was first exposed to firearms around 9-10 years old. My mothers uncle was a member of a gun club and I had started off learning on a .22 from my dad and my uncle. Then I moved to shooting clay pigeons with a shotgun a little after that. In middle school, my parents got me a .22 for Christmas and my dad brought a gun or two of his home from my grandparents. From there he bought a handgun for concealed carry and have for the house. From there it continued to expand as I became a hunter in high school and then on to the military later. Prior to all of this, I do not recall having any firearms in the home.”

Katherine: “Are there classes we can take our children? Or our family?”

Jeremy: “There are different programs for adults to attend in regards to firearms training and education, however children unfortunately are extremely limited. School based programs and weekend camps have been heavily eliminated in recent history due to political persecution of the second amendment. Which I personally think was a step in the wrong direction. As unfortunate as it is, the increase in gun violence in the USA (specifically involving minors) almost perfectly correlates with the decrease in firearms education for children. Which continues to develop generations of uninformed adults (and government officials).”

Katherine: “Do you feel as though your parents/family members set a good example in firearm safety? What did or didn’t they do to set a good example? Do you remember feeling safety conscious around guns as a child?”

Jeremy: I would say they did a very good job. When I was younger, all environments where I was handling a firearm was very structured and heavily monitored. Firearms were also well secured growing up until everyone was a little older and some “security” could be sacrificed for “capability and readiness”.

Katherine: “How do we keep kids safe in other homes with firearms? How can we help ensure our children and their friends do not come across an unsecured gun while they play?”

Jeremy: “Unfortunately, outside of your own child's education, there is very little you can do. This type of situation falls on the adults in the home. An even worse reality is that unfortunately no matter how much you educate, regulate or teach adults, they will continue to be irresponsible across a multitude of topics.”

Katherine: “How would you suggest we have this conversation with our friends and relatives who our children visit?”

Jeremy: “As with all things with friends and family, these topics must be addressed both professionally and with reason. It is also important that we address things from a non-emotional and well informed basis (as we should all things). Perhaps you do not have to address a potential issue yourself, but you ask a more educated or trained member of the family or friend group to address it. Someone who may carry more weight on the specific subject. Such as a veteran, a LEO or the old time family hunter (However, I would like to iterate that just because someone may be a veteran or LEO does not mean that they are as informed or educated as they should be. Titles can be deceiving).”

Katherine: “Do you think the media romanticizes guns?”

Jeremy: “I believe the media/Hollywood do to some extent romanticize guns, while they continue to persecute firearms owners and the second amendment. Which shows a deeper issue with the morality and judgement of the voices we hear from television or our phones. A perfect example of this (without becoming too political) is the current war between Ukraine and Russia. Both media and government officials will praise the armed citizens of Ukraine and claim how they should have been ready sooner, but will attack firearms owners in the USA in the next sentence. In summary, we have become too concerned with the opinions of the media/Hollywood and have not looked to our own social circles and communities.”

Katherine: “How can we as parents ensure our children understand that guns in the media do not portray real life (movies, television, video games, etc)?”

Jeremy: “This once again goes back to real life application and education. Once a child is informed, it won't take long for them to go "hey, that's not right”. For kids are smarter than we give them credit for sometimes.”

Katherine: “If there is anything you would like to add, please do! There are probably plenty of topics I have completely missed. I'd love all of your knowledge.”

Jeremy: “Though the topic of firearms, firearms education, and the great need for an armed populace can be a very long discussion, we must start small as a society after many years of taking steps backwards. This can predominantly start with adults and parents becoming educated and trained themself. The influence and knowledge parents pass to their children are the building blocks for the future of our children and the world we live in. Unfortunately, the world we live in is growing more and more dangerous.

If there are any parents who are not firearm owners, or are firearm owners but are not properly trained, I very much encourage you to seek self education. You may not like the idea of firearms yourself, but similar to many other sacrifices we make, the safety and futures of our children come first. "If you are not willing to fight for what you love, then what kind of love do you have?”

Katherine: "Thanks so much, Jeremy! You’ve been super helpful. You’ve helped me see another side of gun safety I’ve never really considered, so thank you for that. The lack of education I have on guns is likely due to that. I love learning and education so it’s ridiculous that I’ve forgone education of a topic that scared the you know what out of me. Hearing you say a lack of education is what causes a lot of our gun safety issues makes complete sense and I can say I agree with you. Which is exactly why I came to you for this! Thanks for being honest and taking the time to answer my questions regarding gun safety.”

It’s likely that my stance on guns will never change, but I can say this chat definitely opened my eyes to a completely different side of the issues we face today. Jeremy stresses that education is key in keeping our children and our families safe around guns. That sounds like common sense…why didn’t I think about that? Probably because it’s such an emotionally charged conversation for me… and I’m sure others, that it’s hard to be at all reasonable. My house does not have guns, and likely will never. It’s just not anything I am comfortable having around my children. BUT what will likely change are the conversations and the context of our conversations regarding guns. I do believe Jeremy has a point about uneducated people/children are more likely to get hurt around a firearm, so this has encouraged me to have open discussions around my children regarding firearms.

What did you think about this interview? Tell us your thoughts, let’s keep this conversation going! How do you practice gun safety in your home and what are your conversations like with your children?