What Other Physicians Do for Backup Childcare Plans
(Hint: It’s not all pretty — but it’s real)
Let’s be honest: there’s no such thing as perfect childcare when you're a physician. Even the “best laid plans” can go up in smoke with one text: “Hey! Sorry to do this last-minute, but I’m sick and can’t make it today.” 😅
Cue the chaos.
Most families have a Plan A. Some have a Plan B. But if you're in medicine — especially in a two-physician household — you quickly learn that backup plans are survival tools, not luxuries.
So what do other physician families actually do when the nanny gets the flu, daycare closes for a teacher training day (again), or your partner is on call and you have a full day of surgeries?
We scoured Reddit threads, mom forums, Facebook groups, and agency anecdotes to bring you the truth: the messy, the clever, and the surprisingly resourceful.
The Physician Schedule Is… Unique
Let’s set the stage.
You’re up before dawn. Rounds, clinic, surgeries, charting. You’re fielding messages from school, managing meals in your head between patients, and hoping no one throws up — at work or at home.
Add a toddler with a runny nose, a nanny with car trouble, or a partner on a 24-hour shift, and suddenly you’re the only thing standing between the kids and total collapse.
This isn’t just stressful. It’s unsustainable.
Backup childcare isn’t optional for physician families — it’s essential.
So What Do Other Doctors Actually Do?
Let’s break it down.
We looked through real posts and DMs from physicians across the country and found 7 common strategies. Spoiler alert: most people combine several — because there’s no one-size-fits-all.
1. Call the Grandparents (if they live nearby)
Some families are lucky enough to have retired grandparents close by and willing to help — and honestly? They’re the MVPs.
“My mom is on a text thread labeled ‘Fire Drill’ — she knows if I use that, it’s drop-everything mode.”
— Anesthesiologist mom in Boston
BUT… for many, this just isn’t feasible. Maybe they live states away, aren’t physically able, or have their own obligations. Grandparent support is amazing — but it can't be the whole plan.
2. Layered Care (aka: Backup Built into the System)
This is becoming more common: one full-time nanny + part-time daycare or preschool + a casual babysitter on retainer.
The idea? If one layer fails, the others absorb the hit.
“We have a nanny, but we also keep our kids enrolled in a local preschool two mornings a week. That way if the nanny cancels, I can do a drop-off and salvage my clinic day.”
— ENT physician in Denver
This setup costs more, but gives breathing room — especially for high-volume or surgical specialties.
3. On-Demand Agencies or Temp Nanny Services
Some cities have agencies (like mine!) that offer vetted, last-minute care. Think of it like the Uber Eats of childcare, but with background checks and CPR training.
“I keep an agency on speed dial. If our nanny cancels, I text them and usually have someone in a couple of hours.”
— OB/GYN mom in Cleveland
This works best if you’re already a client (so they know your preferences), or if you’ve had a consultation ahead of time. Trying to start from scratch the morning of a shift? Not ideal.
4. Babysitting Co-Ops with Other Medical Families
This is one of the more creative solutions we found on Reddit: swapping occasional care with another physician household in the area.
“We take turns watching each other’s kids on weekends. It’s not perfect, but it’s been clutch when we’re both post-call or sick.”
— Resident dad in Chicago
This requires strong communication and a lot of trust — but it’s gold when it works.
5. Bring the Kid to Work (Desperate Times…)
Not ideal. Not recommended. But sometimes? It happens.
“I brought my baby to morning conference and let her nap in a bassinet under the table. I was the only woman in a room of 20 men. No one said a word.”
— Internal medicine attending in Texas
“My toddler ‘helped’ me chart one day. He typed ‘MMMMMMM’ 45 times and somehow opened iTunes. That was fun.”
— Pediatrician dad in NYC
This isn’t sustainable — and no one wants to do it regularly — but physician parents get scrappy. And sometimes, scrappy means survival.
6. Flex Nannies or Scheduled “Floaters”
Some families proactively schedule backup help.
“We have a college student who comes every Friday, even when our nanny is working. She’s technically backup, but also an extra set of hands.”
— Surgeon mom of twins in Seattle
This also helps cover weird shifts, errands, or split schedules between kids. Think of it as hiring a “just in case” — before the case happens.
7. The Emergency Roster: A Physician Parent’s Secret Weapon
Every physician family we talked to had one: a mental (or literal) list of people they could call when everything else fell through.
Neighbor who works from home
Local babysitter home from college
Nanny from a past job
Co-resident’s spouse
“I’ve called my patient’s mom to watch my kid. Not proud, but she offered and I was desperate.”
— Family medicine resident, anonymous
The takeaway? Keep the list updated. Keep snacks in the pantry. And keep saying thank you to the people who’ve saved your skin.
Real Stories from the Trenches
We pulled these from actual Reddit threads, parenting groups, and agency files (shared with permission):
🍼 “We planned so carefully, but both of us got called in for emergency surgeries and our nanny had COVID. Our 6-year-old spent the night at our neighbor’s. She still talks about how fun it was. We barely survived.”
🍼 “Our daycare closes for teacher planning days at least once a month. I’ve used every vacation day I have on backup care.”
🍼 “We have a whiteboard labeled 'CHILDCARE TRIAGE' in our kitchen. Color-coded. Arrows. Contingency plans. It's terrifying but effective.”
What’s Actually Sustainable (And What’s Not)
Here’s the thing most physician families don’t say out loud: the mental gymnastics of backup care planning is exhausting.
It’s not sustainable to be making calls from the scrub room.
It’s not sustainable to be praying your toddler doesn’t get sick before a 48-hour call weekend.
It’s not sustainable to wonder if your kid is okay every time your phone buzzes during a procedure.
What is sustainable?
A primary caregiver who understands the demands of physician life
Layered support (even if it’s occasional)
A small, reliable roster of backup sitters or temp care options
The freedom to say “yes” to work — because you’re not constantly bracing for the next childcare fire
The Emotional Toll No One Talks About
A lot of moms (especially physicians) feel guilt even admitting they need backup. Or they feel like they’re failing if their “Plan A” falls through.
Let’s normalize this: it’s not a failure. It’s logistics.
And it’s part of keeping your career and your family afloat.
The emotional weight of not having backup — or always being the one figuring it out — is heavy.
One physician mom on Reddit shared:
“I feel like I’m constantly one call-out away from dropping everything. And I’ve worked too hard to build this career to have it all fall apart because I don’t have someone to watch my child.”
You’re not alone. And you’re not the only one who’s had to leave the OR to call the sitter — or who’s cried in the car because daycare was closed again.
Final Tips for Building a Resilient Backup Plan
If you’re in the thick of it and barely surviving Monday to Monday, here are a few practical tips from real physician families:
✅ Build a relationship with a reputable nanny agency — even if you don’t need them yet. You want to be on their radar before an emergency hits.
✅ Keep a Google Doc of backup sitters, their availability, and contact info. Share it with your partner, your nanny, and your neighbor.
✅ Hire overlap help during transitions (e.g., daycare to school, baby to toddler stage).
✅ Talk to your hospital department about childcare emergencies. Some offer subsidies, sick care referrals, or parent resources.
✅ Ask your nanny what their backup plan is. You shouldn’t have to source every solution yourself.
You Deserve Backup, Too
You’re not asking for too much. You’re asking to show up at work without wondering if you’ll need to scrub out early because your child’s school called. You’re asking for peace of mind.
Physician families carry a mental load that few others understand — and childcare isn’t just a convenience. It’s the foundation of everything else.
So, what do other doctors do for backup?
They get creative. They get humble. They get help.
And most importantly? They stop pretending they can do it all without support.
